Advice for the Stumped Bride, Part 2: Wagner and Mendelssohn

If you're a bride dreaming of walking down the aisle to selections by Wagner and Mendelssohn in church, have a backup (and why), and check my post for some piano/organ alternative suggestions!

Ubiquity of the choruses

Any time any school children pick on each other about having a schoolyard crush and getting married, someone starts singing the perfect fourth interval from the Bridal Chorus from Lohengrin by Richard Wagner. We see it everywhere on scenes from sitcoms, movies, etc. Maybe you’ve even dreamed of walking down the aisle to it to be part of this tradition if you grew up in the US and Europe. We just expect to hear it at all Christian weddings… right?

Not so fast. I worked for many a priest who reject this chorus being played, even at the request of the bride, on a number of reasons. Let’s walk through the history of the choruses, the origin stories, full context and some alternative suggestions.

History and Usage of the Wedding March by Mendelssohn

Mendelssohn’s “Wedding March” became famous after it was used at the 1858 wedding of Princess Victoria (Queen Victoria’s daughter) to Prince Frederick William of Prussia.

Mendelssohn’s “Wedding March” comes from his incidental music for Shakespeare’s A Midsummer Night’s Dream (1842), a pagan, fairy-filled comedy that has nothing to do with Christian marriage.

Mendelssohn had a complicated relationship with the church, which flags him as still controversial to the church today - although that doesn’t seem as relevant anymore (and often had some antisemitic undertones because Mendelssohn was a convert from Judaism to Christianity).

History and Usage of the Bridal Chorus by Wagner

Richard Wagner is a controversial figure for many reasons, but somehow, his wedding march became ubiquitous for holy matrimony in the United States and Europe. Wagner’s “Bridal Chorus” followed the same trajectory as Mendelssohn’s. It was first used as a wedding processional in the 1850s and 1860s, soon after Lohengrin became popular. The imagery of a “noble bridal entrance” matched the romantic ideals of the Victorian era.

Wagner’s “Bridal Chorus” (“Here Comes the Bride”) is from the opera Lohengrin (1850). In context, it’s sung after the wedding of Elsa and Lohengrin - a marriage that quickly ends in betrayal and tragedy. It’s not exactly a model of holy matrimony.

In the Catholic Church (and some Anglican or Orthodox contexts), wedding music is supposed to reflect the sacred nature of the sacrament - the context of both of these pieces don’t reflect that in the historical sense or in the opera itself.

Wagner also had a complicated relationship with the church, which flags him as still controversial to the church, but for him, he was NOT shy about his antisemitism and his operatic works and writings directly influenced the policies that the Final Solution were built on (the doctrine to kill the world’s Jewish population) during the Third Reich… So… I don’t know, maybe not the vibe and backstory to bring to your wedding. Just saying. But no one really thinks of that anymore, and no harm if you used this as your wedding processional.

My honest advice: Pick Unique Wedding Music

If you always dreamed of using these selections and your priest says no… Well, get ready to fight your priest, and/or find a different church to be married in. Really. Some priests really do feel this strongly about it. Maybe check with your musician and see if they are willing to plead the case for you; but if the musician is in agreement with the priest, you are SOL.

If you really want to get married in that church and you have a long standing relationship with that priest/pastor/officiant, move on from trying to keep these selections in your wedding. It is not worth it. People will remember the pictures in the beautiful church and the wonderful relationship you’ve cultivated with the officiant for years, no one remembers the music (ask me how I know - I’ve gotten away with many mistakes! I’m kidding… Maybe).

I don’t care about playing these pieces, I don’t have objections to them myself, but you may run into a priest or five that have much stronger feelings about it than I do, and I have, so I’m just trying to help you out here.

Alternative Wedding Processional Selections

I personally would not get so attached to the Wagner and Mendelssohn suggestions, and demand they be played at your wedding, because, THERE ARE SO MANY OTHER BEAUTIFUL PIECES YOU CAN USE, which are church friendly for the very traditional priests. For example:

1. “Arabesque No. 1” by Debussy

2. “The Flower Duet” by Delibes

3. “Canon in D” by Johann Pachelbel

4. “The Swan” by Saint-Saens

5. “Jesu, Joy of a Man’s Desiring” by J. S. Bach

6. “Air on G String” by J. S. Bach

7. “Sheep May Safely Graze” by J. S. Bach

   1. Erm… Well… Actually, anything by Bach would be acceptable because he was a church musician and composer, principally.

I have played all of these in some way, shape or form for bridal processionals… sometimes by accident because the bride got a little excited and sprinted down the aisle during the bridal party processional, I guess the groom looked like a snack? I’ve repeated and worked with these pieces in the most dire and awkward of processionals - they work! They all work quite well, they’re repeatable, and they sound super classy and timeless.

Be You: Unique, not Ubiquitous

My personal advice is that if you have a priest who has a burning hatred of these pieces as processional or recessional pieces, pick another fight. You’ll have bridesmaids and your future mother in law to fight with; pick a piece that will be more unique for your wedding, which will make your wedding more memorable in the end anyway.

Ask your musician if any of the above pieces are doable for them - most are pretty standard and/or not too difficult to prepare in a month or 2 months time if they are unfamiliar. Hope you enjoyed this bit of practical advice to help your wedding music selections easier, and good luck with the rest of your planning!